9/29/09
these days....
i've been planning another one of the 'trick' items i'm doing.....
this time....its a box....
to who..
whom...
what's gonna be inside
what's outside.....
what for.....
i wont say.....juz leave all to guess...
i've started DOING alrdy.....
so lets hope it comes out nicely.....
1mp3rf3t10n
And from here, we plan.
posted at 9/29/2009
9/28/09
you know..... i am a really troubled boy.... juz looking for a way...to escape the reality or the pain from this hellish world....from this lonely place that i tink only i live....
and 2dae....i think i tasted heaven that was on earth.....
i was blinded.... by jealousy...hate....and above all.... ignorance....
i was jealous of all hu has a friend....a true friend somehow he/she can trust..... but i realised...the ppl i can trust is juz by my side....Nicholas,Syafiq,Scott,Rytha,Caroline,Evangeline and lastly,Ruth.
why do i put Ruth the last? her qt....
she might not realise it....but her qt let me hav peace....her qt tells me what really can help.... and maybe....i should start my own....but for now....i'll juz learn from her....
always everyday, my first few webs are....
Facebook then Youtube then my blog then her blog..and lastly, her qt blog.....
Ruth, i owe alot to you.... i dunno if you realise it anot....but heys....for all these you've done unknowingly, you deserve to be rewarded...by both me and God.....
You've kept your faith, and this faith brought on to enlightenment for me....
maybe enlightenment is a big word....but heys, it works for me.....
i dunno what God's gift is gonna be....but i wish he'll protect you.... from all that is evil and impure...you truly deserve such protection with all that you hav done.....
my gift? it'll come in a form of a box....haha....i let your imagination run wild as you wonder wat is it....in time...it'll come.....
i dunno why i'm so protected....what hav i done....do this such a gift from God? i question myself day and night....
maybe, He truly is a person who forgives one and all.... no discrimination from him at all....Fairness....
i noe there is that glimer of hope, that small chance that He has given me to change....
its just me, i'm afraid to change....i've always been afraid to....admit my deepest wrongs.....
i nid strength.....
if i cant get the strength, let me be corrupt...and let me be brought to hell.....
i'll do what i can to help those hu ask....
but i dun tink, i deserve any good.....
i've failed to change and to admit my wrongs.....
1mp3rf3t10n
Ruth, I thank you for all that you've done. I don't think I can stop thanking you. (Familar?)
posted at 9/28/2009
9/26/09
hmm....i was reading alot of cocktail recipes lately....
so i decided to name a few of my friends by the names of cocktails
hopefully, it would be their first.....
except syafiq of course...urs would be a mocktail...
Rytha Lew: Sea Breeze
Reason: Sweet.
Sean Tan: Bloody Mary (infusion type)
Reason: Spicy.
Scott Lim: Apple/Lime Vodka
Not really a cocktail. But yea...i can make it into a Martini
Reason: Zesty
Evangeline: Champagne Cocktail
Reason: Sparkly... meaning very hype!
Ruth: Chocolate Martini
Reason: Bittersweet.
Irfan Syafiq: Sea Breeze (mocktail type)
Reason: Sweet
if u wan, i add club soda to it for your 'bubbly' nature.meanin tend to fight
Caroline: Silver Bullet
Reason: Never misses the mark
By the way, yours is special. your cocktail is a 'shot' cocktail. Strong and simple
yea....basically tat..... if you guys wonder what i would call myself, i'll be the first cocktail i wish to mix and drink
Joseph Lee: Green Jade Blossom
well....the thing is....
the Green Jade Blossom is a drink that nids alot of infused liqour. thus, i wish to experiment on myself first. and also, the green hue it gives kinda reminds me, i'm a person easily jealous.
if you guys wonder what infused liqour you nid....they are
Cucumber Vodka
Green Tea Vodka
Lime Vodka
that's why i wish to make it mine first....
to say the truth, Ruth's cocktail is another that has a TINY WINY more infused liqour
Her Chocolate Martini needs,
Chocolate and Vanilla Vodka
you guys will also be thinking 'why so much vodka?'
Vodka is a simple drink, easily flavoured.... thus... i think its my no.1 liqour.....
if you guys got any request on 'Cocktail labelling' post on my cbox....
1mp3rf3t10n
P.S.
Get 8 bottles of Vodka by 18 years old.
posted at 9/26/2009
9/24/09
why.....why did i hesitate???
i wanted to call u yesterday....wish u luck for ur papers.....
why couldnt i pick up the courage....call u and say...'Good luck!'
i'm so stupid.....and 2dae...i decided to call.....ur mom said ur phone confiscated....i feel so stupid....why....why didnt i???
2dae went to eat subway....tried subway melt SALAD....awesome.....the sauces went well.....all was good for 2dae...except for the screaming from miss choy...and the calling to u.....
oh yea...talking about miss choy....
she asked some questions....had to bite my lip HARD so as not to argue wif her.....
'Don't you find yourself hateful?'
YEA... I DO..... TAT'S WHY I DONT WANT TO DO WORK....ITS NOT FOR ME ANYWAYS....
'Why do you not care about others feelings?'
CAUSE THEY NVR DID FOR ME
'You shouldn't live on.'(i noe its not like tat...but its the message anyways)
YEA....I WISH I COULD DIE.....BUT I'M LIVING...FOR THE PEOPLE WHO WANS ME ALIVE.....I MYSELF WANT TO DIE.....SPEAK TO THEM....NOT ME
'Why did you choose this life?'
FUCK....IS IT LIKE I WANTED TO BE LIKE THIS????? MY LIFE CHANGED ME FUCKER.....
WHO EVER DOESNT DOESNT NOE WHAT THE FUCK ITS HAPPENING TO ME.....YOU HAV NO FUCKING RIGHTS TO TELL ME I'M WRONG.....
I LIVE THE WAY I WISH MY LIFE TO BE TO THE BEST....
YOU AIN'T GONNA FUCKING GET IN THE WAY.
this is speaking to all the mother fuckers who is GONNA get in MY way. or gonna try changing my attitude....
here is an advice
'IT AIN'T GONNA GET IN.AND YOU ARE WASTING YOUR FUCKING TIME ON A FUCKING TRASH.GET GOING.'
man....gonna wonder who's gonna read this.....
1mp3rf3t10n
*knocks knocks*
(opens door)
Death:'Hi! I'm your new neighbour!'
Me:I didn't know I'm in hell.Wait,this is earth isn't it? Ah well. What's the diff. Nice to meet you Death!
posted at 9/24/2009
9/20/09
i'm happy for you! really i am....
you getting baptized and stuff....
its great ur Christian officially....
its juz me... i tink... its juz that....
i pity myself....
i noe i should change so i can be wif you.... but....i dunno if i can do it....
but heys....look on the brightest even if its dark right???
^^
so....even if you DO get over him.... would you even accept me???
haix....
'O's are coming up alrdy....i noe i'm juz sec 3... but...hav to look forward right???
and the course i wan is kinda a far mark......
1mp3rf3t10n
An imperfect wonder.
posted at 9/20/2009
9/16/09
.....
these days feel.....really really awkward.... its like....being lonely all over again...
guess its coz i aint hanging out wif bro so much.....
and guess wat....
went to drink coffee on my own....and was deeeep in thought again.....
u see....i was thinking how everything i wished for.....always ALWAYS has a price.....
1)My grades are going up. But....i'm alone coz i do best wen i am on my own....(i am used to this....dunno why)
2)I wished for a girlfriend...(sec 2...i got one...aint all tat good looking and caused my friendship)
and stuff like tat.....
maybe it really is a curse.....
sigh....
Ruth....i really really wan u to be wif me....
1mp3rf3t10n
Why?
posted at 9/16/2009
9/15/09
so looks like its still the same eh?
actually..was thinking things as going home...
like....how lucky i am and stuff....
lets leave it like this for now....
2dae was not really spectacular...
but u called back...
that's all that's enough to make me smile....
1mp3rf3t10n
REALLY REALLY SHORT POST.
posted at 9/15/2009
9/12/09
lets put a post where i wish to question myself......
Q: Do I deserve you?
A:________
i dun noe the ans....
if its a No....i can say a 1001 reasons why no...(maybe alot ALOT more)
1. I aint a good kid
2.You are too pure
3.I aint in your league (you said so urself)
4.I don't know you well (you said it urself too)
5.We dun see each other often....
etc.
and if its a Yes
well....lets juz say...i can only come up wif 2 reasons
1. I TRULY LOVE YOU TO THE HEAVENS AND NO DOUBT ABOUT IT
2.Er....Well....
i cant tink of a second reason....lets stick wif one now....
you said you salute me....
for being unable to get over you coz i dun see u often...and that u cant get over a guy u see often...
its totally wrong
you shouldn't get over the guy...coz u are seeing him...and ur heart is beating for him....u hav been wif him soo long...it should be understandable....
but me? we din even make the mark.....we werent even together....and worse...i dun see u often.....yet....i cant get over it....mine is not understandable...
my frenz all say i wont get u.....they say we arent made for each other....
but i wan u...not to prove they are wrong...but because i truly love u....and no other gals compare....to ur kindness and selflessness....
its juz...uniquely u....
and coz another point....i like u....for you are weird...
dun lose that....its really cool to me....
for now...all i can say is this....
its nothing much....
1mp3rf3t10n
<3
Jaymie Cheong Wu Ding
posted at 9/12/2009
9/10/09
LOL..its a wonder how i can still come here to type....
first ting off....My Middle and Index fingers are fractured....so yea...i try to type as much as possible...
important times...
ECP
SRC(Singapore Recreational Club)
Ecp is where i broke my fingers....went back skate park...did some stunts...then fell wif my fingers out.....NVR DO THAT!!!!
SRC is my sis the birthday....so...yea..went to celebrate....bowlin was painful....
ok...hand pain liao...cant post....
1mp3rf3t10n
Still thinking of you.
posted at 9/10/2009
9/9/09
sigh.....
emo post for now....zzz.....
maybe its juz me.....haix....snap out of it!!!
sherwins here to stay for the night.....yawnz.....
ruth is in my mind to stay for life....
post post post...who's readin???
1mp3rf3t10n
Short post.
posted at 9/09/2009
9/8/09
2dae has gotta be the best holiday i had....
thx to the bros and lil evan and gang!!! YOU GUYS ROCK!!!!!!!!
so....start off....
couldn't reach Syafiq....but he turned up in the end!
waited at Bedok Inter for lil evan and rayner wif cheryl,brian(hope its correct)and Scott....then...took 16.... got to ECP(ICE BOX WAN FREAKIN HEAVY!!!!!!)
then decided to eat first....so went mac for breakfast....then played touch rugby first....really really sandy!!!!!! haha....then skipping stones....was about to play soccer, then syaf turned up....played soccer....burried me in sand...was really sick wif wat they did.....XDXD. I HAD FUN ANYWAYS!!!! dodgeball next...USED NEWSPAPER BALL WRAPPED IN TAPE...XD
so went wash up....then mac for lunch....AGAIN.....then cheryl went off as we made our way to bicycle shop....first rented mountain bike to get to the skate park....then rented BMX for fun.....HAHAHA....i noe spend alot..... but hells.... once in a while is ok lah..... so did some tricks...fell off as was attempting....so now having friction burn.....and also many MANY other injuries caused by the backwards motion made as u stop ur bike on a ramp.....fell then alot....but was fun through out....
returned bikes and went for pool(table pool)... after 1hr or so....went home...haha...basically that.....
haha...now hurting alot.....pain....XD
but heys...i've suffered worse pain right??? this...nothing....
1mp3rf3t10n
Was hoping I could have forgotten you by today. I just thought of you more instead.
posted at 9/08/2009
9/7/09
.......
i really cant 4gt u...can i????
i juz get so uncomfortable... wen i tink of u....
wen i cant talk to u...
when u are in soo much sufferin.....why couldn't i be wif u.....
why cant i???
WHY AM I SO FREAKING USELESS?????
i cant even do anything right....
i almost got u....i dunnoe....if it had gone on like that for a mth...i might hav gotten u....
why did i ruin it all.... by showin u my other self....
y??? y cant i do anything right....
i juz hate myself so much...
so freakin useless.....
1mp3rf3t10n
My love for you is so strong, but, is it really impossible???
posted at 9/07/2009
9/5/09
sigh.....
dreams went poof.....
and wat to do???
all i can do now....i juz cry silently....
i knew it.... i can nvr get the love of my life....
guess i'll hang as long as possible....i tink oni i noe when how long tat's gonna be....
but heys.....i gotta look on the brighter side of life right???
that's wat u thought me right????haha....
i juz hav to get over u...tat's all....
1mp3rf3t10n
Never gonna give up, till THAT day comes.
posted at 9/05/2009
9/4/09
yo all!!! so the last day is here!!! looking forward to the beach party....haha....
and 2dae? i met chantal and bro (scott)haha....chantal became darker in color....LOL....its kinda weird to me....XD...
and then went home...wanted to skate but grandma home....best dun take out the board.....
now....i've been reading this comic book....
www.onemanga.com...from this web....
i realised, how much it was like...us....
and yet...not....
if u read it..........i dunno....
i dunno if its true....2 u....all i noe its sth similar....yet...not to tat extend....as in...its not that far.....
but i noe u feel the same way as her....Aikawa....
and i juz want to say.....i wish to protect you....should anything be bad for u be coming straight at you......i wan to be ur human shield.....died for you.....for without you.....life is juz sth i would nvr ever hav thought of continuing.....
i dunno if u would ever let me.....
i noe its nvr gonna be mutual.... (however its spelled)
i lost my chance....i did sth wrong to u.....
but...at least....let me protect.....its the least i can do....
1mp3rf3t10n
Bitter Virgin.
posted at 9/04/2009
9/3/09
haha....new skin again...
was looking for sth like this....and apologies for somethings....bout the blog....
you wouldn't see the cursor...srry...couldn't revert it(more like lazy to find the code and revert it XD)
then the snow part???? yea...its on purpose...srry if it is irritating....
ok...now back to life!!!!
skateboarding is fun!!!! though falling hard on the ground elbow and hips first isnt really recommended... hurts alot for a while...
then...yea...abit sad about the whole lunch thing being canceled...but YEA!!!! we hav got time ahead...and i did enjoy life on my own....
but this crush aint gonna go away tat simply... i still love you lots....
Ruth....
i noe its all crazy...but heys! i'm used to chasing impossible dreams...
1mp3rf3t10n
Stars.
posted at 9/03/2009